technology

Study Finds Technology Is Boosting Vagisil Sales

Ok, there’s no proof that technology is actually increasing sales, but you’ll understand the reasoning behind the title soon enough. If we were to conduct a study on technology here is what we would find. We rely on technology to get us from point A to point B. We rely on technology to communicate to one another. We rely on technology to entertain us. Gentlemen, grab your balls. What? Did they go missing? That’s because you’re now officially a pussy. So smear on some Vagisil and continue reading to figure out how to get your manhood back.

Technology: A double-edged sword

Technology is taking the world by storm. It’s causing us to be lazy and inactive. Now with virtual reality being an actual reality, you can fight dragons as if you were actually physically there. Cool brah. Dungeons and Dragons FTW. Yup. “For the Wussies.” And even better news, you can now have virtual sex with a woman without even leaving your Mom’s basement. Cool man! Grab your Cheetos and you’re ready to go. You’ll be dry humping the air in no time!

Snap the hell out of it guys. Take your manhood back. Back in the day real men carried around a club. They’d have to hunt and beat their prey just for food—there was no McDonalds or Wendy’s Drive-Thrus. They would drag their woman around by the hair in their caves (don’t do this in real life, you’ll end up sitting next to Bubba in a jail cell crying because he just violated you in more ways than one). As we evolved, we’ve gotten lazy and complacent as a society. Everyone wants the easy way out of everything. Whatever relieves them of actually doing work that involves physical labor is the choice most choose these days.

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Matt Weik

Matt Weik, BS, CPT, CSCS, CSN, is the Owner and Head Keyboard Banger of Weik Fitness. He is a well-respected, prolific writer with a global following and a self-proclaimed fitness and supplement nerd. Matt’s content has been featured on thousands of websites, 100+ magazines, and he has authored over a dozen published books.